A tale of love and sadness

I was once a lonely person. I didn't yearn for much love or companionship...As I was afraid..
Afraid of the things that might come. Sure you may all say that love is a wonderful feeling and all those nonsense..But deep down.. With love..Comes unbearable pain and heartache which is waiting...waiting for its chance to emerge from the dark depths of a person's heart. Looks like I was right, It did come...
Once again my heart is broken..Shattered to be exact. Now I wonder if I will ever find the courage to believe someone again, share my heart with this very person and most of all..To love again.
Now, I will tell you my tale...My tale of shattered dreams and beliefs. I used to be a cold hearted person..Well.. Cold hearted in the way of accepting people into my life. I thought that this might be the most easiest solution of it all. A solution that will safeguard my heart from any potential heartbreak that will come. That was until I met her..My special one.. I felt a sense of joy and friendship when I was with her.. And that feeling evolved into love. One of the reasons for that may be the fact that I sensed some similarities between her and me. Both of us.. Always hiding our true feelings inside and maintaining a happy face in the presence of others even though we are feeling like our hearts being slashed repeatedly with sharp whips. I had always hated that feeling..And that was why I really cared for her. I wanted to be someone who she could always tell her problems to....I wanted to be there for her.... I didn't want anyone to suffer like I always did..
It was beautiful in the beginning... My life was changed before my very own eyes.. I had become more open about my feelings. I had learned how to love again. Every single day when I was with her, I felt as if I was in heaven... Angels dancing everywhere.. Clouds of love around us.. I was even foolish enough to think that we were gonna last..Forever...
A few months later, she went on a holiday trip to another land. Before that trip..We were talking like usual. Eagerly, I waited for her to come back..But she never did.. Instead.. I met a complete stranger. I didn't know her anymore... From that point onwards... I questioned myself if she ever loved me anymore. Things changed.....We never talked like we did before... And she treated me as if I was a ordinary friend. From that point onwards, I sensed that something inevitable was about to happen. Something that I had feared the most. We broke up. Tears of despair ran down my cheeks. This time.. My heart was shattered. On that day, I was really confused.. I was even on the brink of suicide..But my common sense told me not to do so.. I told my self " Its not worth it "..I said it almost a thousand times to myself. Finally..I had to let go.. Let go of everything..
I still and always will love her...My feelings had never changed. Maybe we were not fated to be together. Nevertheless.. Karen.. If you are reading this.. You can always tell me your problems.. No matter what happens I will be there for you... Like I used to as your companion.. But now..As your friend..
Now..I shall return to the place..To the deepest pits and hide myself there. My shattered heart will remain frozen.. Until someday.... So remember.. Don't love someone deeply to easily.. Cause you might not know when your heart will be broken.. heartbreaks may take lifetimes to forget..