Tuesday, August 27, 2013

Bookmarks!


Watching the clock tick while having absolutely nothing to do in the office can be an excruciating thing to do, so what should you do to spend your time? Read of course! Here's a link to a few of the sites I visit quite often.
  1. One of my favourite sites for every skill a man needs, and they do come out with particularly good articles especially the one entitled "The Majesty of Strength" < The majesty of strength >
  2. Who said Christianity related things were boring, here's a comic strip to prove you wrong!
    http://adam4d.com/ >
  3. After all the fun clicking on page of wikipedia after another in your office, get kicked back into your sense with a dose of reality and responsibility with this article "How to glorify God at work" < how-to-glorify-god-at-work >
  4. Yeah i know, it's not an article, well listen to it while you read the links above then! heehee. This song has been stuck in my head for awhile now! Introducing.... *drum rolls* Gerald Ko singing a cover for the song (You exist in my song)  < "我的歌聲裡" >
  5. Dead man's poem! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nnu3L-Grn-0

kthxbai

Sunday, August 25, 2013

Questions of Identity

I am, therefore I do
I do, therefore I am

Are your actions and works based on your identity?
or
Is your identity based on your actions and works?

If one day, you stop doing a certain set of actions, does that invalidate your identity?

Look in the mirror, look at yourself.
Think.
Who are you?

When pushed to the absolute pits of helplessness, what is the basis of your will to live? Fear?
What is your life's dogma?
Why are you on this planet? Just another mere existence waiting to perish?
Do you believe that you have a great destiny? What is the basis of your belief?

So, what is your identity?

So many questions.
Only one answer.

Friday, August 16, 2013

The heart so wretched

I felt the breeze of the mountain top,
The muddiness of life slowly washed away as the rain drop,
Life's why's, the if's and the what's
Traded in the serenity of a lonely tear drop.

As we make our way down from this stop,
Did we ever wonder what that muddiness was all about,
Striving each day to fulfil the never ending wants,
The joy of freedom for the chains of the world, we swap.

We read God's word like a mythical fable from Aesop,
Going to the words of comfort and treating it like how a fickle woman window-shop,
Avoiding the truth which we need to confront,
Confession of the downtrodden soul and the wretched heart.

Why art thou cast down, O my soul? and why art thou disquieted within me? hope in God
As the Father's voice gives us a prod,
The soul laud, and the heart thaws.
For I shall yet praise him, who is the health of my countenance, and my God.

Thursday, August 15, 2013

Joy

Blinded by the devil's ploy,
Being played by the wicked plans like an helpless toy,
The devil's only purpose being to steal, kill and destroy.

But remember, God's plan is sovereign,
We are His children which He will never abandon,
He lifts us up when we are heavy laden.

From the maddening depression,
To the very limit of alluring temptation,
I endured patiently in this wretched prison.

Came one day, I heard a whisper from heaven,
Felt like soothing rain from the living waters of His fountain,
A much sought after encounter in the mountain of Zion

I found joy in the midst of ruin.

Anchored in Christ



Taken from Our Daily Bread, 15/8/2013.

We have an anchor that keeps the soul,
Steadfast and sure while the billows roll;
Fastened to the Rock which cannot move,
Grounded firm and deep in the Savior’s love.




Sunday, August 11, 2013

Past & Present

So how has working been?

It's been about 3 months since I started out my job and these past few weeks has been an especially trying time for me in an emotional, social and spiritual sense. The whole phase of getting excited over starting a new step in my career was dying down on me which made me think that it's entirely normal for the majority of people working out there.

This "settling down" period scared me, I didn't believe in settling down for mediocrity especially with my high flying dreams and passions for my career. I was scared at the idea that one day, I would wake up dreading to go to work. I wanted to be constantly challenged at work, to encounter new things and experiences, to pave a way and lay the sturdiest foundations for my future. I demanded 110% from myself in work hours, to be as efficient as possible in doing all my tasks and to not miss a single thing, to not leave myself vulnerable to any possible mistakes at all in the work that I do, to learn all I can learn from any resource available to make myself better at this job.

All this left a heavy toll to my emotional and psychological well being. The feeling of wanting to be perfect in every job was born from the fact that I feared failures. To fear the future consequences and possibilities of failure. Next thing I knew, I was suffering from depression. It took me awhile to recognise this fact.

What was different in this period of time?

My outlook on life became more dim. I became alarmingly cynical of what people said and also what they did not say. I felt that people thought that all these "successful" things in my job made me a boastful person when I talk about it. I didn't feel like sharing these things any more cause it'd only make people spiteful right?
I didn't feel like talking about my job any more. Any queries to my job would be answered with the usual, "Yeah things are looking alright I guess".

Talking to God about these things made it momentarily fine, but the depression would just come flooding in again when I wake up. For the first time in awhile, I felt lonely.

It wasn't fun, it hurt. But being the egoistical man I am, I would never admit to such things. I mean c'mon, depression? depression are for pussies. Real men don't get depression.

But yeah, they do. I don't know what has changed for the past few days, but I'm getting better. In God's mercy and grace, I shall strive on.

This whole experience made me relate to the psalm 143 written by David.

Perhaps, all this experience is a fulfilment to the prayer of making me like David, a man after God's own heart.



Tuesday, August 06, 2013

Flight



But they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint
Isaiah 40:31

Monday, August 05, 2013

Psalm 143


Come quickly, Lord, and answer me,
for my depression deepens,
Don't turn away from me,
or I will die.